There are bad days.
And then there are really bad days.
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Last night, my mom came in as Micah and I were watching television, and she looked like she was in shock. Then she told us that the doctors think that Bryan has Myloma – Cancer.
Micah and I were in shock.
And then I said, “How is it possible? He is the most perfect human being that has ever lived.”
Micah said, “Hey…what about me?”
And I said, “Yes, you heard it here — Bryan is the greatest man I have ever known!”
(And Micah would even agree.)
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A million thoughts went through my head about Bryan, his kids….and MEGAN!
I was devastated.
I didn’t sleep until my eyes forced themselves shut. But when I woke, I thought it was all a bad dream. I walked around like a zombie all day, while I did life….kids, cleaning, cooking, Emails. But that night, I needed a few minutes alone. I ran an errand as I cried and prayed in the car. And then I started singing one of my favorite primary songs - A Child’s Prayer.
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Heavenly Father, are you really there?
And do you hear and answer ev’ry child’s prayer?
Some say that heaven is far away,
But I feel it close around me as I pray.
Heavenly Father, I remember now
Something that Jesus told disciples long ago:
“Suffer the children to come to me.”
Father, in prayer I’m coming now to thee.
And do you hear and answer ev’ry child’s prayer?
Some say that heaven is far away,
But I feel it close around me as I pray.
Heavenly Father, I remember now
Something that Jesus told disciples long ago:
“Suffer the children to come to me.”
Father, in prayer I’m coming now to thee.
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As I sang, wondering if my Heavenly Father could really hear my prayer, I looked over to see the sky on fire, with the most beautiful sunset I have ever seen.
I continued on…
Pray, he is there;
Speak, he is list’ning.
You are his child;
His love now surrounds you.
He hears your prayer;
He loves the children.
Of such is the kingdom, the kingdom of heav’n.
Speak, he is list’ning.
You are his child;
His love now surrounds you.
He hears your prayer;
He loves the children.
Of such is the kingdom, the kingdom of heav’n.
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I had the strongest spiritual experience as I quietly drove and sang.
I have always considered this a children’s song, but I now know that this is as much a song for me as anyone.
I know my Heavenly Father hears and answer my prayers.
And I know that He is mindful of the greatest man I have ever known.
I love you B.
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And when I finally made my way home, the kids ran out to tell me that they had seen the most beautiful rainbow they had ever seen.
And I didn’t doubt it for a moment.
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